D A Y t h r e e “Ninja Time-Bambi impersonations-Snipers & Hiccups”
I am sitting and don’t want to stand up…and when I stand…I don’t want to sit down!
This, my friends…is the predicament I have faced since I took on ‘D A Y o n e’.
That little light goes on in your head after 3 months getting a splinter ass on the bench - you come out of the gates like the ‘donkey’ that pays a tidy sum if she blows the field out of the water on debut…but then she hits that last turn after leading by 3 lengths and blows a gasket…YUP…I.AM.THAT.DONKEY… or I think the better reference here would be ASS!
SO..This ASS…she got through day one and was actually pretty pumped that I got through 80% of the strength side before the ‘Gary-Jack’ got a little upset with me…I was OK with this - it was the first test.
Then we hit the altitude chamber for a solid hit out on the treddy…surprised myself with the fact that I have a fetish for stilettos and the calves were actually managing to allow the heels to hit the ground minus the usual 6inch support.
All in all - high fives were had…coach and I went our separate ways…I hit the dreaded foam roller (we shall now refer to as ‘Foam of Torture’) and WOW…this kid certainly found an extensive vocab…with a wealth of descriptive words!
I thought to myself, just text the boxing coach and say “look, it’s the first week…I’ll just do one session…ease in…don’t want to over cook myself…we have 3 months yet”.
Let’s just say I rehearsed this a couple of times in my head- then i realised A) I hadn’t gotten off the floor since I got home 2 hrs ago, and B) it was now 11pm and too late to text.
5:00am my alarm went off…the only time i use to enjoy seeing that TIME was when I was walking through my front door - pumped I hadn’t been ‘That Girl’ with a pair of high heels in my hand and gotten home before the street cleaners made my stride of pride a little less… well..un-pleasant!
SO..back to what i refer to as NINJA time - because I am generally in slumber and when the alarm goes off, it scares the shit out of me and if anyone was watching me - they would think I had turned into a ninja with how quickly I flung out of bed out with sheer fright! Then I chop-suey the snooze button…
So, I made it to PowPow time, I looked more like Bambi the way my feet and hands got tangled…amazing the skillz you DON’T have when you’re not shadow boxing…on your own…or when you have had a cheeky handful of dutch courage…
Session done - off to work…with every intention of hitting that pavement again that night - however now my calves were gagging for the relief of a 6inch heel…just so they didn’t have to stretch out. My quads now thought it was funny to REFUSE to function when I walked down a set of stairs - and I looked like a sniper had hit me every time i took that first step down.
Yeup…now repeat after me again Renee “All in the name of charity!!” It’s only DAY TWO!!!! I am in deep shit here :)
so…I opt for a healthy chicken sandwich for lunch…I’m on the run and had buckley’s chance of throwing anything else up - slight hiccup…or in this case…ACTUALLY…would you refer to the scene in the exorcist , when she spins her head around vomiting…as a hiccup or…” - well, I kinda became “That Girl”…slight hiccup this food poisoning!
So today - when I woke…I was high fiving the shit out of the hiccups…coz it gave me a spell from lethal Sniper attacks- oh wait…I just got a Facebook alert from my Boxing trainer “INSERT FELLOW TRAINER I CALL NEVILLE” Has declared war on you tomorrow”….now where did I put that chicken sandwich????!!!!!
This, my friends…is the predicament I have faced since I took on ‘D A Y o n e’.
That little light goes on in your head after 3 months getting a splinter ass on the bench - you come out of the gates like the ‘donkey’ that pays a tidy sum if she blows the field out of the water on debut…but then she hits that last turn after leading by 3 lengths and blows a gasket…YUP…I.AM.THAT.DONKEY… or I think the better reference here would be ASS!
SO..This ASS…she got through day one and was actually pretty pumped that I got through 80% of the strength side before the ‘Gary-Jack’ got a little upset with me…I was OK with this - it was the first test.
Then we hit the altitude chamber for a solid hit out on the treddy…surprised myself with the fact that I have a fetish for stilettos and the calves were actually managing to allow the heels to hit the ground minus the usual 6inch support.
All in all - high fives were had…coach and I went our separate ways…I hit the dreaded foam roller (we shall now refer to as ‘Foam of Torture’) and WOW…this kid certainly found an extensive vocab…with a wealth of descriptive words!
I thought to myself, just text the boxing coach and say “look, it’s the first week…I’ll just do one session…ease in…don’t want to over cook myself…we have 3 months yet”.
Let’s just say I rehearsed this a couple of times in my head- then i realised A) I hadn’t gotten off the floor since I got home 2 hrs ago, and B) it was now 11pm and too late to text.
5:00am my alarm went off…the only time i use to enjoy seeing that TIME was when I was walking through my front door - pumped I hadn’t been ‘That Girl’ with a pair of high heels in my hand and gotten home before the street cleaners made my stride of pride a little less… well..un-pleasant!
SO..back to what i refer to as NINJA time - because I am generally in slumber and when the alarm goes off, it scares the shit out of me and if anyone was watching me - they would think I had turned into a ninja with how quickly I flung out of bed out with sheer fright! Then I chop-suey the snooze button…
So, I made it to PowPow time, I looked more like Bambi the way my feet and hands got tangled…amazing the skillz you DON’T have when you’re not shadow boxing…on your own…or when you have had a cheeky handful of dutch courage…
Session done - off to work…with every intention of hitting that pavement again that night - however now my calves were gagging for the relief of a 6inch heel…just so they didn’t have to stretch out. My quads now thought it was funny to REFUSE to function when I walked down a set of stairs - and I looked like a sniper had hit me every time i took that first step down.
Yeup…now repeat after me again Renee “All in the name of charity!!” It’s only DAY TWO!!!! I am in deep shit here :)
so…I opt for a healthy chicken sandwich for lunch…I’m on the run and had buckley’s chance of throwing anything else up - slight hiccup…or in this case…ACTUALLY…would you refer to the scene in the exorcist , when she spins her head around vomiting…as a hiccup or…” - well, I kinda became “That Girl”…slight hiccup this food poisoning!
So today - when I woke…I was high fiving the shit out of the hiccups…coz it gave me a spell from lethal Sniper attacks- oh wait…I just got a Facebook alert from my Boxing trainer “INSERT FELLOW TRAINER I CALL NEVILLE” Has declared war on you tomorrow”….now where did I put that chicken sandwich????!!!!!
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